Having the block member button is a very good thing. I've had to block a few people myself. But that's after they did something that bothered me or offended me, which takes a lot. You shouldn't block someone that is just trying to make friends with you. You never know, they might have some info that might be able to help you in the future. Feel free to block assholes as they come along. And if they persist, tell a Moderator.

We probably won’t look back on 2020 and say, damn there were a lot of interesting sexuality studies that year, however there really were! Here are six studies that stood out.

The pandemic fucked with our sex drive. Journal of Sexual Medicine, surveyed 868 British adults about how much sexual activity they were having each week since they began self-isolating and social distancing. Sexual activity was defined as "sexual intercourse, masturbation, petting, or fondling." The results? Just 40% of people reported engaging sexual activity on a weekly basis. That means 60% of people weren't having sex⁠ -including masturbation- even once a week. Some of the reasons for this are obvious: People who are single or who aren't connecting with new partners, and therefore don't have anyone to have sex with during self-isolation. And on the flip side, for couples who are living together, the stress and anxiety of the pandemic can trample sexual desire and make it hard to really get in the mood, even if you are spending a lot of time at home with your partner.

Gay males appear to be way more chill about receiving unsolicited dick pics than straight women. The Journal of Sex Research found that straight women predominantly had negative reactions to unsolicited dick pics including feeling disrespected, grossed out or violated. Only 26% of women reported having a positive reaction. In contrast, men tended to view receiving genital images more positively than women. About 44% of men reported being “entertained” and 41% reported feeling “curious” after receiving a dick pic. Though gay and bisexual men were much more likely to report positive reactions to receiving unsolicited genital images; one fourth of the men reported having a negative reaction. So it appears that the same dick can receive different reactions depending on the sexual orientation and gender of the receiver.

Men who have experience with sex workers are less sexist. Men and Masculinities created an online survey of over 500 men who have paid for sex found that their beliefs regarding gender roles were more progressive than the average in the United States. Specifically, in response to questions such as, “A working mother can establish just as warm and secure a relationship with … as a mother who does not work” and, “Most men are better suited emotionally for politics than are most women,” men who had paid for sex were more likely to give the response that showed their belief in gender equality. The results suggest that paying for sex doesn’t imply that men devalue women more than other men, if anything, the results suggest the opposite.

How women feel about their relationships changes throughout their menstrual cycle. A study from Biological Psychology got women to track their menstrual cycles and write a daily journal on how they are feeling about their relationships. It was found that women had more negative views towards their partners during ovulation. The research suggests that during our most fertile time we may naturally take a step back from their partners to assess other potential mates. This is in line with previous research which shows women are also more likely to fantasize about cheating on their partners while ovulating. Personally, this just sounds like another study proving women get really cranky when they are PMS’ing - nothing new to see here folks!

Thinking of sexuality as an exchange or barter is associated with less happiness and satisfaction in a relationship. Stephanie Raposo, M.A., a Ph.D. candidate at York University, surveyed and observed a total of 711 adults in committed relationships, asking them questions to understand their perspective on sex, how their sex life was in the relationship, and how the relationship was in general, and found couples who had a more communal approach to sex - rather than a trade-and-barter style - tended to be happier with both their sex life and their relationship. The research also found people whose partners had an avoidant attachment style also tended to steer toward a more exchange-oriented approach to sex. Although the sexual-exchange approach might feel safer and more beneficial to people with avoidant attachment styles, there are some consequences to the approach, and may actually detract from, sexual and relationship quality Meanwhile, if both partners are motivated to meet each other's sexual needs just for the sake of it, sex usually does end up being more pleasurable for both parties.

Dudes can smell when you are aroused. Psychologist Arnaud Wisman Ph.D engaged in a study where straight men smelled the sweat of aroused and non-aroused women. It was found that the aroused women’s smell were rated as more appealing and were more likely to increase arousal in the men. This is in line with previous research which has found that men can smell when women are ovulating and can even smell our tears! Can you guess which one of these two men find arousing and which one is a boner killer? Of course, men aren’t consciously aware of what they are smelling, it is their subconscious mind which has evolved to associate female arousal with a higher chance of sex and tears with a lack of sex.

It’s impressive that so much fascinating research on sexuality was done during a global pandemic. Which results surprised you the most?

I have experienced some really bad head in my time. There was the guy who took off my pants and then without any warm-up or moisturizing the area put two fingers inside me with his long and dirty nails. There was the guy who was convinced that my clitoris was just above my left thigh and despite my direction kept rubbing that area. There was the guy whose ex-girlfriend loved a certain maneuver with rough pressure on her clitoris, and even after our third hookup couldn't understand why it wasn’t working for me. Licking pussy is an art that involves both skill and communication. I have some advice that can help you up your pussy licking game!

Start slow! Foreplay is so important because it highly impacts the way sensations feel. For example, if someone goes to eat my pussy and I’m not warmed up yet, the stimulation can feel uncomfortable and like it’s a bit too much. However, if I’m aroused that same stimulation would feel amazing. I would suggest thinking of the clitoris as a treat that you only get to play with once you’ve put some time teasing and exciting it.

The tease can look like slowly licking and touching your partner, getting closer and closer to their pussy until their whole body is begging for it. It can also involve deep kissing and rubbing against each other. It can involve dirty talk. It can involve stimulating your partner with their underwear on before you slowly take it off. If this is not a quickie situation, I would suggest waiting at least ten minutes before you directly stimulate the clitoris.

Put your face into it! There is no better feeling than the sensation of being fully aroused and then having someone put their whole face into your pussy. The vulva has nerve endings down both sides of it and the more sensation you put against our whole pussy the better it feels. I would be gentle about it, but getting your nose and mouth and cheeks involved can feel amazing. Cardi B was on point when she sang “swipe your nose like a credit card” during her song, Wet Ass Pussy.

It’s also really sexy to think about how someone is so into you that they want to get as close to you as possible. While you are putting your face into it, you can use your senses to describe the sensations that you are experiencing. For example, how do they smell, taste, feel, look? A compliment is always arousing!

Communication! Keep an open line of communication before, during, and after lickin’ dat pussy! Pre-head, you can express how much you want to make them feel good and even ask if they have any specific desires as it relates to oral sex. During-head you can ask how it feels. Would they like it harder or softer? Is one finger better inside or two? Is the amount of pressure you are using too much or just right? Post-head, you can discuss how it felt. Was there a particularly sexy moment? Especially if you are planning on being with this person again it’s helpful to know their experience of the encounter.

Communicating doesn't have to be unsexy. You can ask these questions in an arousing way. “Does baby want another finger inside her or is she squirming enough already” “You can’t cum without my permission, but I do want to get you right to the edge. Should I keep licking you like this to make that happen?” “God, you’re so wet. How can I make you get even wetter?” Communicating during sex can feel weird for those that aren’t used to it, but once it becomes part of your routine it can make a sexual encounter particularly satisfying!

Play with different types of sensation. There are so many ways that you can stimulate a clitoris. Once you have an open dialogue going try circling your tongue around the clitoris. Ask your partner how it feels. Then try flicking your tongue against the clitoris. Try sucking the clitoris. Try moving your tongue in a figure-8 motion around the clitoris. It may take playing around with different pressure and tempos to figure out what works for your partner. The internal clitoris can be stimulated from inside the vaginal hole so for many putting a finger inside them while you lick their pussy can feel amazing. Perhaps even rubbing the area around the anus, which has a lot of nerve endings, in conjunction with putting a finger inside them and licking their pussy can be the perfect trifecta.

Use a sex Toy. There is an outdated belief that using sex toys on a woman somehow indicates that you are less of a man because you are calling in reinforcements. But what is implied when you use a sex toy is that your oh-so-powerful penis doesn’t have five function vibrations. Sex toys can be an awesome addition to oral sex and can make the sensations feel more powerful for the woman. Isn't that what men should want to facilitate?

For example, it’s really hard for one person to get the trifecta of oral, anal, and vaginal stimulation at the same time. But if you put in a butt plug, or anal beads while you go down on a woman, that will help increase sensation. You can forget about them until she is about to orgasm, and then pull out the beads. Similarly, you can put a dildo inside your partner while you gently lick their pussy, or use a vibrator on their clit while you finger them. Adding sex toys into the mix can be a powerful way to create more pleasure and can give you more types of stimulation to explore!

It is so easy to get into oral sex routines and not play around with new types of stimulation. If you try these tips and become comfortable communicating with your partners about what sensation feels the best, you will drive them wild. After an oral sex orgasm, penetration feels insane for most ladies, so beyond feeling satisfied that you pleasured your partner, you too will reap the benefits of giving your partner pleasure when she thanks you later.